Beauty is all in the eyes of the beholder
by xBlue-Rosex
Summary: She kept appearing in his dreams...he kept seeing her every where he went, she wouldn't leave his thoughts. Up for adoption!
1. Chapter 1

Ok so before you read this let me say that I had this idea that Alex had a lover before all hell broke loose on New York city, this is my own original idea, things in the actual game may be changed, not much but minor things...I'll probably add in more of my own characters as well. So enjoy I guess, oh and please review and let me know how I'm doing! Oh one more things sorry, this isn't really that important but the dream scene in this chapter is an altered version of a nightmare a character has in the book I'm writing so please don't steal it. Thank you :)

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><p>It was an ordinary night in New York city, the sky was dark and dotted with stars. I walked the streets like I normally do, gazing at my surroundings and taking in it's beauty. Yeah I know what you're thinking; beauty? What is he talking about the entire city has been taken over by the infection…what could possibly be beautiful about that? I'm not sure why or what it was but this mass destruction seamed somehow beautiful in my eyes. Maybe it was the way the sky looked in the dark of the night with the stars illuminated by the crimson fires which swept over the city, or perhaps it was the simple way that people interacted with each other that I find beautiful. It was always interesting to me, the way humans moved, the way they spoke….the way they seamed so….innocent yet vile at the same time. I walked like them and looked like them for the most part, but I'm not one of them… I've always wondered what it would feel like to walk among them and know that I belong and not feel like an outsider, like a monster. But I'll never know what that feels like, not now, not ever….but at least I can pretend right? I can pretend to be one of them, to walk among them, feel the emotions they felt, to see the world the way they see it.; but that's all in my head. I'll never be like them, never be able to understand them the way they understand each other, to see the world the way they do….because I perceive the world as my hunting ground, and the people as my prey…<p>

The wailing of sirens woke me from my stupor. I looked about myself to find that I was walking directly in front of a military base. I walked closer to the base and took a seat right there, out in the open, with my back up against the wall of the base. Now I know what you're thinking, why would I choose to site directly in front of a military base? I know it seams kind of crazy to just sit down were you are surrounded by you're enemies...but I had an idea. I was bored of running from them, I wanted to see what they would do..go ahead and call me crazy...but I got an adrenaline rush from things like this, I loved to see there reactions...

I sighed and let my head flop to wall then closed my eyes and began to drift off.

I was walking in a forest, dense with trees of every kind. I heard the familiar sounds of forest animals, screeching birds and chirping tree frogs. There was a flash of color and a high pitch laugh that fallowed soon after.

"Hello, anyone there?" I yelled out as I looked around for where the sound came from. Just then a woman popped out of the trees, she was of medium height and had long blonde hair that came down to about her waist. She had a heart shaped face accompanied by huge dark blue almond eyed. I stood still gazing at the women, at her white gown that looked to be made of silk and covered very little of her body. She gave me a smile then began to run in the opposite direction.

"Wait!" I yelled out as I chased after her. As I ran I noticed I was barefoot and nearly naked wearing only a pair of jeans. After running for what seamed like hours she stopped. She turned towards me then motioned for me to come closer. I took careful steps as I came closer to her.

"Where are we?" I gasped as I looked around to find all the trees of the forest gone; in fact there was nothing in sight except for the gorgeous woman standing before me.

"Why have you taken me here…?" I asked. She starred at me for a long moment then began to speak.

"We can be together now, just you and I" She replied smiling.

"I don't understand, am I... dead?" I asked walking closer to her.

"Here we may be together, forever." She said.

"Lisa, I'm sorry I can't I… I have to keep fighting the infection, I'd stay here with you but I...I can't just leave the city like this. You of all people should know this...you died from the infection after all..." I said. My mind was fogged, why was she asking me to stay here with her? How could I stay with her in a dream..unless...she doesn't mean to stay here in a dream...unless this isn't a dream...

"Alex, I love you forget about the city and stay here with me where you belong. Leave the others to stop the infection and stay here with me." She pleaded.

"I… I can't. I'm responsible for this mess and now I have to clean it up" I said shaking my head and backing away from her.

"I can't Lisa, where you're at you have to be dead to go, I'm not dead yet..I'm not sure that I'll ever get to stay there with you I have to fix this. I can't stay here with you!" I said. The scenery along with Lisa disappeared but I could still hear her pleading.

"Alex I need you, please stay." Was the last thing I heard her say. My eyes shot open and I sucked in a deep breath of air when I woke, it felt like during my dream I hadn't breathed. When I looked around I found that I was still at the military base, sitting in the same position, only the sirens were getting louder and military personnel began to point their guns at me. I sighed, brought my knees up to my chest hugging them with my arms and let my head drop to my arms. I felt warmth on my cheeks before the tears racked my body.

"Why do I keep seeing her in my dreams...she's been dead for months now, I haven't thought of her once and now I can't stop thinking about her..." I mumbled to myself. Moments later I felt a dull pain in my side; someone had kicked me.

"Just, leave me alone ok? I'm not attacking you, I just...*sigh* I just need to think.." I said lifting my head up, wiping at my tears with both hands.

"Uhh...sorry I just..uhh...they...they wanted m..m..me to t..t..talk to you." I heard a voice say. I looked to my left and standing before me was a black watch officer, shaking in his uniform.

"They wanted you to talk to me? What happen to shoot on sight?" I asked, trying to keep my voice at a neutral tone. I looked away from the soldier and turned my attention to the dark sky, which was now begging to lighten up.

"Let me guess, they sent you out here to see how long you'd last near me for there own entertainment?" I asked looking back at the soldier.

"Uhhh... " Was the only answer I got from the officer.

"Ya know what, never mind." I sighed standing up from my spot. The soldier now had his gun trained on me and he was shaking even more.

"Relax, I'm not going to hurt you." I said gently pushing the gun out of my face.

"You're...you're not?" He asked puzzled.

"No...I've actually been thinking and ... believe it or not, I don't want to be this monster anymore, I don't want to kill innocents any longer...I..I want to some how regain my humanity back.." I said almost in a whisper. The soldier gave me a quizzical look before cocking his gun and pointing it back in my direction.

"How do I know if you're not lying? How do I know that when I turn around to leave you won't slice me in two?" The soldier asked, his gun shaking in his hands.

"Yeah, I wouldn't trust me either if I were you but I'm being serious...and why I'm confessing this to you is beyond me, I guess it's because I have no one else to really talk to, no one that'll listen, after all everyone I loved is dead...even Dana...I lost her not to long ago..." I said, beginning to walk down the street. The soldier fallowed after me keeping him self at a safe distance. As we began to walk a few soldiers surrounding us stopped and starred, stunned that I hadn't already ripped this guys head from his throat.

"You know before this whole thing happened I had a significant other, someone who I loved with all my heart, someone I'd die for..." I stopped and looked at the soldier who seamed baffled at my words.

"I..I'm sorry, I'm rambling and you're probably not even listening.." I trailed off.

"Uhh..no no.. please, go on." The soldier said, lowering his gun and looking at me with bewildered eyes.

"Her name was Lisa...and she was my world...we were going to get married, have a family...but when the infection started she died." I took a deep breath and pushed back my tears. The soldier gestured for me to continue so I did.

"At first when I...when I became this thing, I didn't feel emotions the way humans did...I didn't care that she died. But since I've been around humans for this long, I guess I'm beginning to act like one, to feel like one. At first I never thought of Lisa, she was a distant memory, but now that distance has closed and I can't stop thinking about her...I guess that you could say that I'm grieving for her..." I said. I stopped walking and looked at the soldier who now had tears begging to spill over his eyes.

"I'm so sorry..." The man choked, holding a hand over his mouth.

"It was my fault she died... I guess at first I was just angry...angry that I had become something like this...and I wanted revenge, that's why I started killing...but I no longer want revenge..I want...I want redemption...to make up for my wrongs." I said. I leaned against the nearest building for support, the soldier by my side did the same. A few soldiers around us came up to us, curious to see what was going on, everyone in the surrounding area, well the soldiers that is, knew I was Zeus, and they were wondering why I wasn't running around rampant, killing everything in my path.

"Uhh..please go on...I'm still listening." The soldier said. I looked about my self, at the curious soldiers who had surrounded us, when my eyes met their's they cringed and took a step back.

"I have nothing else to say really...I'm sorry, I shouldn't have even said any of that...I should just leave." I said heading off in the other direction, the soldiers in my way clearing a path for me. The same soldier from before came running up behind me, shouting.

"Wait! What if I could help you find a way to redeem you're humanity?" The soldier said. I stopped in my tracks and spun around until I was facing the solider.

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><p>I did take the idea of the officer walking up to Alex from another prototype story and I give credit to them, I'd put there name on here but I don't remember it at the moment. If you don't like me using this idea I understand, just let me know and I'll change it. :) Tell me if this completely sucks, I don't really know where I'm going with this right now, I had an idea for this story and it took a completely different turn. Any suggestions would be great!:D Don't forget to review please!<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

"Why would you help me?" I asked looking the soldier straight in the eye.

"Because I know what it's like to want redemption… to want to feel like you're human again." The solider answered. I raised an eyebrow at his reply…I raised an eyebrow? That's a new one I'm even making small human gestures now… when will my body stop trying to be human…stop imitating them…when will I realize that I don't belong with them…I mean I know that I don't but it's like my body thinks differently and I become more like them every passing moment.

"Because before I became a soldier, before I saved lives, I took them away. I used to be a murderer…then one day I had an epiphany, and I realized that I didn't like taking lives, I wanted to fight for them, to protect them instead." He replied. I was dumb struck at his answer. I gave him a quizzical look before speaking.

"So you think you can help me by getting me recruited as a soldier." I said bluntly.

"I uhh…yeah. Look the infection is getting worse and we desperately need help. If we get you on the team maybe we'd stand a chance in defeated the infected…maybe the city will have a chance to survive." He answered back.

"you think that they'd really let me in? I the fucking black light virus for crying out loud!" I laughed throwing my arms up in the air and making a scene.

"Look, it's not like we can capture you anyway and if you really want to help, to uh..redeem you're self, why shouldn't we let you?" He asked. I don't know why but all of a sudden I got really angry, this guy really thinks he can help me? He thinks that he understands me? In a flash I reached my arm out, grabbed him by the throat and pinned him to the wall behind us.

"Do you have any idea how many deaths I am responsible for? It wouldn't matter if I helped you defeat the infected, no amount of good I do will over ride the bad I've already committed." I said gritting my teeth. At my sudden action the soldiers around us pointed their guns at me, ready to shoot.

"Don't shoot, don't shoot!" The soldier in my grip yelled.

"It wouldn't matter if they shot anyway, I'd just regenerate and you'd end up dying, I'd escape and life would go on." I said dropping the soldier who hit the ground with a thud.

"It doesn't have to be that way anymore!" The soldier protested, standing up and rubbing his neck.

"If you'd just let me talk to them, convince them you're on our side now. We could help you, we could find a cure somehow...someway to turn you back to normal." The soldier said taking a step closer to me, gaining bravery with every second.

"You don't get it do you?" I asked taking a step back.

"I can't be cured! I am the black light virus, I have no amount of humanity left. I am not Alex Mercer, his body is only my host, I may have his memories, his face, and I may love the same people he did, but he died the day he let the virus loose. I was born that day, living in this hell hole that he made, fixing his mistakes, mourning his loses. If you found a cure, the only thing it would do to me is kill me and hey! maybe that would just be ok... " I said ending my rant in a whisper. I turned around and began walking off again. A few moment later I felt a hand on my shoulder, and gasps filled the air around me. I turned around and sighed; the same soldier starred me down, daring me to make a move.

"At least let me try, let me talk to them. Please." The soldier begged. Why was this guy so bent on helping me? There has to be more to it then the fact that they need help or that he thinks he understands me; but there's only one way to find out. I grabbed his arm and pulled it off my shoulder gently...gently? I was being gentle...yet another human trait I've picked up.

"Alright fine, go ahead and talk to them." I sighed. A smile lite up the soldiers face and he bounded off in the direction of the base before stopping in his tracks and bounding back.

"Uhhh..wait here I guess." The soldier said then headed off once again.

"Yeahh.." I laughed then took a seat on the side walk and leaned back against the wall behind me. I nearly fell asleep again but just as the dreams started a voices ended them. I slowly opened my eyes and looked up at the soldier that stood in front of me offering me his hand.

"Uhm...they don't believe that you want to help.." The soldier studded. I took his hand and he helped me up; not that I need it..I'm not even sure why I was letting this guy help me...I should have just killed him the first chance I got...but something's holding me back.

"What did I tell you?" I asked the soldier, my voice more neutral then I thought it would be.

"Maybe, if you come into the base with me, you could show them...maybe if they witness that you're on our side now they'd trust you, or at least hear you out." The soldier said. Was this guy nuts? He does know that if I go into the base and he's at my side, they'll attack me and end up killing him in the process right?

"uhh...I don't think that's such a good idea." I said straightening up my jacket. Yet another human trait I've picked up...need I point them all out?

"Well just...come with me and we'll try ok?" Ok...this guy is really nuts... Suddenly the soldier grabbed my arm like a pleading child and lead me to the base. With a sigh I followed him. Once we were close enough to the base the sirens went off. I stopped in my tracks and went wide eyed when I saw a row of super soldiers blocking the entrance.

"Are you trying to lead me into a trap?" I asked angrily pulling my arm away from the soldier.

"n..no...no I'm not...they uhh...it's just a precaution...I promise.." The soldier stuttered, clearly scared at my sudden anger.

"Right..." I said. Why was I still fallowing this guy? Clearly this was a trap...and I know I can take out super soldiers no problem, but I haven't consumed anything in a while...so I'm allot weaker than usual and they could probably take me down easily. Maybe I keep fallowing him because I want to get caught...to stop running...stop fighting...stop hurting people. I deserve to be dead...

I was jolted from my thoughts when both my arms were grabbed by super soldiers. I didn't struggle against them and let them pin me to the ground. Everyone surrounding the base was baffled that I would give up so easily...no I didn't give up...I just don't care anymore.

"Not a trap huh?" I asked the black watch soldier from earlier as he walked past me, he stopped, and turned toward me.

"Oh not at all Mercer." The soldier replied with a hardened tone.

"You know I meant what I said earlier." I said with a slight laugh. The soldier was surprised at this.

"And what was that?" The soldier asked. When the super soldiers got a firmer grip on me they brought me back up to a standing position and began to drag me into the base.

"I meant everything I said actually, especially when I said that I'd be perfectly ok with dying. I'd love to be released from this hell hole!" I bellowed. The soldier gritted his teeth and grunted in anger at my response. The last thing I saw was a foot hurtling toward my face, then my world went black.

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><p>Ok I really don't know where this is going now...any suggestions?<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

(In progress!)

I woke with a dull pain through out my entire body. I groaned and tried to sit up, but found that I had been bound to the ground by heavy chains. When I looked about myself, I found that I was in a large containment chamber with clear walls and surrounding each and every one of those walls were black watch soldiers, commanders, super soldiers and normal soldiers alike. When I was fully awake I found that it was hard to breath, then I started to notice it….crimson colored gas encased the room wall to wall; it was blood tox. A coughing fit sent my body in spasms, and caused the soldiers surrounding me to turn their attention from each other to me. The coughing fit finally subdued, and left me down on my hands and knees, gasping for air.

"Ah, I see you're awake...good." A deep voice boomed, before a shadowy figure walked into view. There standing before me was a gruff looking commander.

"So what are you going to do with me now that you've captured me?" I asked, pushing back another coughing fit. I sat up a bit and leaned against the wall for support. I could feel the blood tox draining all of my energy, I barely had enough to stay conscious.

"We have a proposition for you." The commander said, leaning against the glass and straining to see through the crimson gas; although I could see him perfectly fine.

"Yeah, and what would that be?" I asked, fallowed by coughing.

"We need your help Alex, the infected are getting stronger and even harder to kill; we're loosing soldiers left and right. If we don't do something now, something drastic, then they'll over power us and the human race will cease to exist." The commander said.

"Mmmmhhmmm and your way of asking me to help is locking me in a room full of blood tox?" I growled.

"Precaution; that shouldn't be too hard for you to understand should it?" The commander asked. I sighed in response and looked down at my hands, how many have I killed? How many lives have I stolen from men, women and children alike...

"I understand." I said, my voice more of a whisper.

"How could you trust me after what I've done? Do you honestly believe that you could trust me? What if I pretended to help you, then turned on you. I'd have more information than I'd need to be able to take down the entire military." I replied, forcing back another coughing fit.

"That's just a risk that we'll have to take. We can either trust you, let you help us take out the infected, you could destroy us anytime you wished, or if you didn't help us we'd end up destroyed by the infected anyway. We need your help Alex, and I have reason to believe you will." The commander said. I remained silent, and thought for a moment.

"What exactly gives you reason to believe I'd help you?" I breathed a heavy sigh, then coughed violently when I sucked in a deep breath of blood tox.

"We've been watching you Alex, you've changed. Everyday we see new changes in you, how much more human you're becoming. I believe that you want to help us...that there's a reason why you let us capture you." The man replied.

"To feel human again...to feel like I belong, to know that I'm not an outsider is what I want..." I said in such a low voice I wan't sure that he'd heard me, but by his answer I guess he did.

"Then it's settled, we'll help you gain your humanity back, and in turn you help us defeat the infected." The man said. I sighed, and allowed my heavy eyes lids to close for a moment. I was having a pretty hard time keeping myself conscious with the amount of blood tox in here.

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><p>Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I'm working on several projects at once and just now got back to this one. It might take me a while to update this one because of the fact that I'm not too sure where I'm going with this one and right now, I'm just writing it without a full on plot; which isn't the smartest idea. So right now I have no real plans for this story and whatever happens happens ya know? If you have any suggestions I'd love to hear em! Please read and review! :)<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

Now up for grabs! I do not have the modivation or interest to keep this story going and I don't think it's fair to just leave it unfinished like this. If you are interested in continuing this story please pm me.

There are just a few things, if you do decide you want to take the story:

- Do NOT take any credit for what I have written already; give me credit for my work please!

- Do NOT edit my writing (with the acception of grammar... there could be some things I missed)

- Keep the formating and writing as close to what I have as you can, that also goes for characters, rating etc

- Keep the story up! I don't want to hand the story to someone who will loose interest and forget about it, that would defeat the purpose of my adopting it out

If the story does get adopted out, I will leave my part of it up on this site, just as a heads up, I wont completely take the story down and I will add who took the story in the last chapter. Also, I will be keeping an eye on it, I'm curious as to where someone would take this :)

Again, if ya want the story, pm me and I will give ya a basic idea of what I had planned with the story, I don't expect you to stick with my ideas, hell you can go crazy! Just don't stray too far from the plot and make it completely random... please don't screw my story up :O

I doubt anyone wants this, but I thought I'd give it a try. Please don't try and take this story without my consent, I will report it.

Also, if you try and take credit for my part of the story, or completely edit it I will not hesitate to report it.

If ya wnat the story, send me a pm, and add "You're gonna go far kid" somewhere in the pm so I know ya read this whole thing, and yes that is the name of a song :)


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